HAILEYSTONES| Clutter Nutter

ALL MY LIFE, I have been a slob. Clutter is my best friend. When I am busy, my room looks like a very small, localized rainstorm hit it. There are computer wires and cables in my underwear drawer and books in my closet. My study table is actually just a broken sewing machine that is housed by a pile of clothes that I have yet to wear. My dresser is filled with more stationery than actual beauty products.

Touch my mess, however, and I throw a fit. There’s something about owning up to being messy and unorganized, because the only person that this clutter needs to make sense to is me. My Naynay knows never to clean my room during finals week, because my nerves are on end and everything from a lost pencil eraser to a butterfly clip will set me off.

This is especially evident now that I am doing my thesis. Everything is a mess, but I wouldn’t dare touch it. My storyboards and my drafts are all in one pile on my bed and in the other are my adviser’s comments, my laptop wires, and my camera. I don’t know how I manage to sleep without something poking me in the eye.

Two of my best friends also happen to be a couple, and one of them lives in their own apartment. His girlfriend helps him with household expenses, from paying bills and groceries to making sure the floor is mopped. They don’t live together — they just happen to have that sort of agreement. One of the things I notice whenever I drop by is that the apartment is, in itself, its own organized mess. They are both very particular with how things are arranged, and if their hair wax ends up near the mirror instead of being near the dresser, they freak out.

This makes me want to have my own place, though. Although I live in my own house, I want to try living on my own — and hopefully a lot closer to downtown — because it seems so fascinating. Being able to claim this space as yours and getting to decide the level of mess in your house sounds so appealing to me. I mean, even in a dorm or a boarding house, you have to compromise. I don’t even mind if it’s just one room with no windows. At least it’s mine.

I find that as you get out of college, you want more and more to be able to make something of yourself and claim something as yours, even if for a while. It’s always about who can get their own car first, or their own house, or who gets a job immediately after school. That’s a lot of pressure to put on someone who also has to deal with the end of formal education.

At least, that way, if you end up leaving stuff where it’s not supposed to be, no one can get mad at you because it belongs to you. It’s scary to think of the responsibilities involved with being on your own, but I think that everyone should try to be on your own at least once. I want to make my own messes. I want to not be able to wash dishes when I don’t want to and leave my body spray in the fridge without someone putting it back.

Of course, I understand that being a total slob isn’t a good thing. It’s not nice to just procrastinate on cleaning your own room. For once, I want to be able to decide on what is clean for me, and how I organize things, and how I decide where things should go. This way, I have no one to blame if my storyboards end up temporary blinding me. That’s going to be fun.

Posted in Opinion